Are you unsure if the person you’re seeing is the one you’re falling in love with? Here are twelve signs to help you know if you are in love.
Most likely, you’ve already enquired about the warning signs with a close friend or member of your family. And if they’re like most people, they probably responded with “you just know,” “it’s hard to describe,” or something equally vague—all of which, needless to say, are pretty unhelpful.
Continue reading to find out more about how to differentiate between these connected but still fundamentally different experiences.
Your Thoughts Return to Them Regularly
Perhaps you often reflect on your most recent interaction or schedule your next meeting. Everyday experiences—the good, the bad, and the ordinary—are what you want to share with them.
If they’re struggling, you might worry about them and consider ways to support them. You might talk about them frequently and envision how much your loved ones will adore them when you’re with family and friends.
You Feel Safe With Them
Typically, a vital part of love is trust. This sense of emotional safety might be especially important to you if you’ve previously gone through relationship trauma or heartbreak.
When you see them, you might notice that your tension eases, much like when you get home from a long day. It is common to want to ward off pain. Often, the development of love is suggested by feeling secure enough with someone to confide in them about your weaknesses or vulnerabilities.
Life Feels More Exciting
Particularly when you know you’ll see them soon, the hormone rush that comes with love can make everything seem more exciting. When you’re together, time may seem to pass quickly, but once they leave, it may seem to drag.
You might even experience a resurgence of enthusiasm and vigor for your daily routine. Going for a walk? Folding laundry? Love is so much more fun, especially when your significant other is nearby.
You Want to Spend a Lot of Time Together
You might discover yourself yearning for their company more than ever before if you love someone, which frequently entails wanting to spend a lot of time with them.
You might leave their company feeling a little unfulfilled as if your time spent with them wasn’t long enough.
You may not care much about what you do together, simply that you are together.
Another telltale sign is that your desire to spend time with them is independent of how they are feeling or how active they are. You still want to be there and offer support, even when they’re feeling down, grumpy, or frustrated with life.
You Feel a Little Jealous of Other People in Their Life
Like all other emotions, envy is a feeling. Generally speaking, how you handle jealousy is what counts. It never hurts to talk about your feelings, but you might want to forego social media monitoring and digital snooping.
When you are in love with someone, you might become fixated on the other people they hang out with and speculate about their relationship. You might also worry about possible obstacles to your relationship, like an attractive coworker they frequently bring up or an ex who is still a part of their life.
Generally speaking, as trust grows, these concerns tend to subside.
You Feel Compassion for Them
You’ll start to have a lot of compassion for someone when you fall in love with them. Your relationship takes on new dimensions as a result of the intense desire to be connected to this person. These include emotional or physical intimacy, passion, and a desire to learn everything there is to know about them and be known by them in return.
It’s possible that you’ll start to feel the need to look after or be looked after by your partner.
You Want to Share Your World With Them
Dawoon Kang, cofounder, and co-CEO of online dating platform Coffee Meets Bagel, tells Oprah Daily, “Falling in love are different for everyone,” adding she believes in The three main components of love, according to Robert J. Sternberg’s triangular theory, are intimacy (the desire to feel closely connected), passion (physical and emotional stimulation), and decision/commitment (the resolve to stick together).
“You don’t need all three components to know that you’re falling in love, but they are strong indicators that you’re on the way,” she explains. “However, if someone isn’t exhibiting the same exact signs of falling in love as you are, don’t assume that they aren’t.”
You Feel Like a Teenager Again
According to Kelifern Pomeranz, PsyD, a clinical psychologist and licensed sex therapist with a practice in California, falling in love have a way of making you feel like a wild-eyed, naive teenager again.
“When you fall in love, your body releases a variety of chemicals, including dopamine (which makes you want more), noradrenaline (which makes you excited, focused, and attentive), testosterone (which makes you want to have sex), and a decrease in serotonin (which can make you feel slightly obsessive).
These substances give us feelings of joy, giddiness, vigor, euphoria, and youth.”
They Become a Priority
“We make time for what–or who–we love,” says Chief dating guru at Match (previously Match.com), Rachel DeAlto “If you’re rearranging, reprioritizing, and reimagining your life, you may be falling in love,” she explains.
It doesn’t feel like a sacrifice when you have to rearrange your schedule to make time for something important to them (like a family gathering or dinner with a sibling who is traveling from out of town), like brunch with your girlfriends.
You Crave Them
You did read that correctly, I assure you. Craving a person is similar to craving a favorite food or even a seasonally appropriate cocktail (hello, frosé).
In her research on these emotions, Helen Fisher, Ph.D., the chief scientific advisor for Match, discovered that when you’re falling in love, more dopamine is released from the ventral tegmental area (VTA), a region of our brain connected to focus and craving.
This longing typically comes with a rush, as DeAlto points out when you think of them.
Your Relationship Feels Easy
It is not always difficult to be with your partner. To spend time with them, you don’t have to make an effort—you just want to. “When we are flooded with feel-good emotions and empathy, believe [a partner] is unique and special, and see them in a positive light, a relationship is easy,” Dr. Peck explains.
There are occasional disagreements and arguments, but they don’t feel overly intense or like they will cause the relationship to end. Your relationship, not your pride, comes first when you’re in love. You “communicate, compromise, and choose to be responsive rather than reactive,” Dr. Peck says.
This Person is on Your Mind All the Time
If you haven’t spoken to them in a few hours, you might decide to call them out of the blue. Another scenario is when you go into a store to buy something for yourself and end up leaving with something for your partner as well.
“When you like someone, you can brush it off and think of other things as you go about your day,” When you’re in love, you think about your partner constantly, but not in a negative or overbearing way, according to Sullivan.
“Theoretically at any/all times, loving someone has an impact on your body, mind, and emotions. It is a calm and secure reality you will consistently crave,” Sullivan says.
