Gaslighting is a manipulative technique where a person sows doubt in another person’s mind in an effort to gain power and control over them. The individual gradually starts to doubt their reality as a result of their ongoing self-doubt. Here are 10 signs of gaslighting for you to check your relationship. Please keep reading.
Signs Of Gaslighting
Even if the person gaslighting you knows you’re being told a lie, they’ll still be upfront about it. This is meant to confound you and make you doubt your reality. As time passes, you might frequently notice that these rises.
Making You Question What Was Said
You might be certain that you overheard something, but a gaslighter will frequently deny saying anything along those lines to make you feel guilty. Your memory may be questioned by this technique, and the victim might face accusations of being mistaken. Phrases such as ‘I don’t remember, you’ve got that wrong,’ or ‘No, that’s not how it happened,’ may be used. They might also employ a strategy known as distortion, in which they exaggerate old memories or facts. These don’t even have to be associated with the topic at hand, but they usually serve to further confuse the situation.
Trivializing Your Feelings
They might accuse you of being overly sensitive after you say something, making you or your feelings seem or feel unimportant. You might also be met with a smirk or a laugh.
The Feeling Of Being Worn Down
It takes time for gaslighting to develop. It’s an accumulation of lies and negative comments that create an environment where you’re anxious and end up questioning yourself
Actions Over Words
Watch a person’s behavior; with gaslighters, it’s common for their words and actions to convey completely different meanings. Everyone has the right to express themselves freely; however, what they do matters more than what they say.
Although it may seem counterproductive, those who gaslight frequently mix in some encouraging words among the criticism. When you hear it, you might be uneasy and wonder once more if the gaslighter is really as bad as you had assumed.
The goal of gaslighting is to undermine your stability because the perpetrator is aware that confusion breeds weakness. It’s not unusual for a victim to look to someone they care about or crave approval from for reassurance and stability, which is frequently The Gaslighter.
You shouldn’t be shocked if the gaslighter accuses you of something they actually do. It could be lying, using drugs, or something else entirely. In many cases, it makes you feel as though you must defend yourself, deflecting attention from the gaslighter’s behavior.
The gaslighter may be trying to turn people against you, or at least making you believe they have. They frequently have a reputation for being master manipulators; occasionally, political, commercial, and sales situations involve the use of such techniques.
Something like, “This person thinks this about you,” The gaslighter is lying to you, which is something they’re likely to do frequently, so it’s important to keep in mind that this is frequently not the case. It’s another attempt to make you unsteady and unsure of who to believe.
A gaslighter may occasionally say things to you in an effort to make you think they are coming from someone else. As a different strategy to get you to doubt your reality, they might also try to convince others that you’re unstable or a liar.
Changing Your Environment
They could start to alter your surroundings in a number of different ways. Your favorite things could mysteriously disappear or some of your most valuable possessions could sustain damage. Things might seem to be missing for a while before suddenly appearing where you thought they had always been.
How To Stop Gaslighting
Trust Your Intuition
If you feel something is wrong, do yourself a favor and trust your intuition.
If you can’t pinpoint the source of your unease, confusion, or unhappiness, your partner—who is possibly a covert gaslighter—might be the culprit. You’ll be able to defend yourself once you focus on the actual issue.
You shouldn’t need a gaslighter’s approval to do anything. Ask your friends, family, or a therapist for support instead.
They’ll be able to spot any signs of toxic relationships if you explain how you’re feeling and what’s actually going on in your relationship.
Be Aware Of Your Values
Make a list of your values to protect yourself. Remind yourself of your value. Don’t let the gaslighter treat you poorly; you deserve better.
You’ll be able to tell unhealthy patterns from healthy ones by re-establishing your value.
Tell the other person right away if they go over your tolerance level. If a person abuses you, let them know that you will not tolerate it.
Even though confrontation isn’t always the best strategy, the abuser needs to be made aware that they are no longer in charge. They’ll definitely be perplexed by that.
Consider Leaving The Relationship
Consider ending the relationship if nothing changes and they continue to abuse you. Is being with someone who makes you utterly miserable really worth it?
Defend your convictions and recognize your worth. Leave the relationship if that’s the only way you can protect yourself.
Remember That Gaslighting Is Never Your Fault
Remember that you shouldn’t hold yourself responsible for your circumstances. You haven’t done anything wrong, and you didn’t deserve to be misled in the first place.
Gaslighting is disappointing, but you can stop it if you try your best. It can be challenging to think positively about ourselves when we are constantly being spoken down to, so try your best to be kind to yourself. Whenever you need it, ask for assistance, whether it comes from a family member, a mental health professional, a helpline, or another person.